Create A Calm Down Kit
If you tend to come home from work stressed and take out your anger on your family, or you know that workplace meetings cause you a lot of frustration, create a calm down kit that you can use to relax.
Think about objects that help engage all your senses. When you can look, hear, see, smell, and touch calming things, you can change your emotional state. So a calm down kit might include scented hand lotion, a picture of a serene landscape, a spiritual passage you can read aloud, and a few pieces of your favorite candy. Include things that you know will help you remain calm.
You also might create a virtual calm down kit that you can take everywhere. These are things that you can call upon when needed and are more portable. For instance, calming music and images, guided meditation, or instructions for breathing exercises could be stored in a special folder on your smartphone.
Spend Time With Friends And Family
Social support from friends and family can help you get through stressful times.
Being part of a friend network gives you a sense of belonging and self-worth, which can help you in tough times.
One study found that for women in particular, spending time with friends and children helps release oxytocin, a natural stress reliever. This effect is called tend and befriend, and is the opposite of the fight-or-flight response .
Keep in mind that both men and women benefit from friendship.
Another study found that men and women with the fewest social connections were more likely to suffer from depression and anxiety .
summary
Having strong social ties may help you get through stressful times and lower your risk of anxiety.
Its hard to feel anxious when youre laughing. Its good for your health, and there are a few ways it may help relieve stress:
- Relieving your stress response.
- Relieving tension by relaxing your muscles.
In the long term, laughter can also help improve your immune system and mood.
A study among people with cancer found that people in the laughter intervention group experienced more stress relief than those who were simply distracted (
Try watching a funny TV show or hanging out with friends who make you laugh.
summary
Find the humor in everyday life, spend time with funny friends or watch a comedy show to help relieve stress.
Not all stressors are within your control, but some are.
One way to do this may be to say no more often.
Anger Management Techniques For Stressful Occupations
Remaining calm: its the hardest part of the job.
Whether its a drunken student biting off more than he can chew, or a genuine threat to your safety, security staff are regularly placed in precarious situations that would challenge almost anybody to stay in control.
Thats why these 17 tips are so important. May they help you in your career, as well as your day-to-day life.
Read Also: Why Do I Always Feel Stressed And Anxious
The Benefits Of Residential Anger Treatments
Residential anger treatments help patients learn to gain control over their anger and frustrations. Your therapist can help you to recognize dangerous situations and to become more conscious of the warning signs of impending rage. Additionally, intense residential treatments can help you learn to avoid anger suppression, which can lead to hypertension, depression, heart troubles and anxiety.
Most importantly, you can develop these strategies while removing yourself from the triggers and risks of the outside world.
Anger Management Tips To Prevent Relationship Damage

Do you fume when someone cuts you off in traffic? Does your blood pressure rocket when your child refuses to cooperate? If so, you are not alone. Everyone experiences anger from time to time.
Anger is a normal and even healthy emotion. But it’s important to deal with it in a positive way. Uncontrolled anger can take a toll on your health and relationships.
If you’re often feeling angry, or if those feeling are causing problems at home or at work, here are 7 tips to help you regain control:
1. Think before you speak.
One of the best tactics is to take a pause before reacting. If your heart is pounding and you feel like yelling at your friend, family member or the guy who just pulled in front of you in traffic, stop. Take a breath. Count to 10. Do whatever it takes to avoid lashing out and saying or doing something youll regret.
2. Once youre calm, state what upset you.
Express your frustration in an assertive but nonconfrontational way. Maybe your spouse didnt help clean up the kitchen after you made dinner. Or your son borrowed your car and returned it with a nearly empty gas tank again. State your concerns clearly and directly, using an “I” statement. For example, say, Im upset that you left me without enough gas to get to work, or I resent it when I work to prepare a meal and you dont help clean up afterward.
3. Use humor to release tension.
4. Take a timeout.
5. Get exercise.
6. Practice relaxation skills.
7. Don’t hold a grudge.
Topics in this Post
Recommended Reading: What To Do When You Are Stressed
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Treatment For Anger Disorders
One of the most common types of psychotherapy is cognitive behavioral therapy. The purpose of the treatment is to help an angry person recognize the self-defeating negative thoughts that lie behind anger flare-ups. Patients work with a mental health professional to learn how to manage stressful life circumstances more successfully.
The cognitive behavioral approach has many benefits. Patients learn to:
- Cope better with difficult life situations
- Positively resolve conflicts in relationships
- Deal with grief more effectively
- Mentally handle emotional stress caused by illness, abuse or physical trauma
- Overcome chronic pain, fatigue and other physical symptoms
Cognitive therapies are structured and may offer quicker results than other approaches. Better yet, the results are lasting, with patients showing significantly decreased relapse rates.
This sort of treatment tends to focus on specific problems and personal triggers. Youll learn how to deal with your particular issues using conscious, goal-centered strategies.The specific steps in cognitive behavioral therapy include:
- Identification of situations or circumstances in your life that lead to trouble
- Awareness of your thoughts and emotions surrounding anger triggers
- Acknowledgement of inaccurate, negative thought patterns
- Relearning of healthier, positive thought patterns
Why Guys Lose It
For thousands of years, fathers have been teaching their sons that anger is acceptable and that other feelings, such as grief and fear, just arent manly. For better or for worse, thats one reason guys often choose anger over expressing sadness or vulnerability. Similarly, there is a long history of anger being the only acceptable negative emotion guys can show at work or in other group settings.
At its core, anger is often a response to feeling hurt, and it may be easier to be angry than it is to admit to being vulnerable. Suck it up! Men dont cry! Dont be a sissy! Sound familiar?
Don’t Miss: Why Do I Have So Much Stress
Why Patience Is A Virtue
Adopt the pace of nature: her secret is patience Ralph Waldo Emerson.
In most cases, you dont need to respond to a situation right away. You can take a little time and evaluate that situation from a slight distance.
Often, our first reaction to a problem is an emotional one, but emotional solutions rarely solve problems. What is required is clear, balanced thought.
Take a second, breathe deeply and try to imagine any negative emotions leaving your body as you exhale.
Practice patience every day. You can do this by reading more , planting something to watch it grow, cooking from scratch, collecting something one piece at a time, building models, or finding a creative hobby such as drawing, painting or learning to play a musical instrument.
Any or all of these activities will help you to become a more patient person.
Can Children Learn Anger Management
Childhood is the perfect time to learn how to deal with anger. Everyone gets angry, but finding appropriate ways to express their emotions can help set children up for a successful future.
Consider involving a school social worker or your childs pediatrician for additional guidance and resources. Family counseling may help improve parenting dynamics and teach ways to set boundaries and provide consequences.
Don’t Miss: How Can You Cope With Stress
Concerned About Stress And Anxiety
Take one of our 2-minute mental health quizzes to see if you may benefit from further diagnosis and treatment.
Similarly, if youre angry with your partner and want them to change a behavior, your attempt at controlling them is likely to produce a negative reaction. The goal is to share your thinking with the hope that youll be heard, not to shame the other person. Remember, its unlikely that you will be heard if your words and behaviors are lighting up the fear-response in your partners brain. Immaturity begets immaturity so often in relationships. It might feel critical to send a rude text to your partner while theyre at work or wake them up in the middle of the night with your grievances, but these strategies rarely accomplish more than escalating a conflict.
Simple Ways To Relieve Stress And Anxiety
We include products we think are useful for our readers. If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. Heres our process.
Stress and anxiety are common experiences for most people. In fact, 70% of adults in the United States say they feel stress or anxiety daily.
Here are 16 simple ways to relieve stress and anxiety.
Exercise is one of the most important things you can do to combat stress.
It might seem contradictory, but putting physical stress on your body through exercise can relieve mental stress.
The benefits are strongest when you exercise regularly. People who exercise regularly are less likely to experience anxiety than those who dont exercise .
There are a few reasons behind this:
- Stress hormones: Exercise lowers your bodys stress hormones such as cortisol in the long run. It also helps release endorphins, which are chemicals that improve your mood and act as natural painkillers.
- Sleep: Exercise can also improve your sleep quality, which can be negatively affected by stress and anxiety.
- Confidence: When you exercise regularly, you may feel more competent and confident in your body, which in turn promotes mental wellbeing.
- Try to find an exercise routine or activity you enjoy, such as walking, dancing, rock climbing or yoga.
Activities such as walking or jogging that involve repetitive movements of large muscle groups can be particularly stress relieving.
Read Also: How Managers Can Reduce Stress In The Workplace
Tips For Stress Management
Stress has many adverse effects on a persons health. It can lead to significant heart problems, mental issues, headaches, insomnia, and more frequent illnesses. These effects can often lead to poor performance in the workplace and seriously affect your relationships.
This makes stress management an important aspect of everyday life. By managing your stress, you can elevate your work, relationships, and health. You can take specific steps that help better manage your stress and maintain a healthy emotional level.
How To Control Anger Outbursts In 5 Steps

May 13, 2020 by Alison Cook
Nothing can improve your relationship more than learning how to control anger outbursts. For example, do you find yourself losing your temper with your loved ones? Do you yell at your kids more often than youd like to admit? Or, do you get resentful towards your spouse and lash out with sarcastic remarks? You might even be swearing to high-heaven inside your mind muttering words under your breath youd never say aloud.
When anger festers, it doesnt always come out as loud screaming. It can surface as vindictive digs, passive-aggressive swipes, or a full-blown tantrum.
If youre like most women, you dont want to feel this way. But, struggling to figure out how to control anger outbursts can be difficult. As a counselor and coach for over 20 years, Ive helped numerous women overcome their internal angst.
Heres the trick. The way to control anger outbursts is NOT to silence your thoughts or beat yourself up for feeling angry inside. In fact, berating yourself will only make the problem worse. Instead, the way to control anger outbursts is to:
Make anger your ally.
How do you make anger your ally? Use the following 5 steps:
Recommended Reading: How Can I Stop Stressing
How To Deal With Stress And Anger Step #2 Step Back
This is NOT easy to do, but its a very important step.
It took me some time to develop enough self control to master this technique.
You must take a step back from your anger and view it from the perspective of a third party.
If someone said something mean about you, the natural human response is to get defensive or angry.
Take a step back and ask yourself why youre stressing yourself out over this.
Do you secretly believe that what the other person said about you is true.
Very often, people feel insulted by comments from others because they believe them to be true on a subconscious level.
If its not true, why would the other person put you down?
Are they normally unhappy people who take pleasure in tearing others down?
Youll realize that in most cases, theres nothing much to be upset about.
You can just dismiss these comments and move on with life without being stressed or aggravated.
Analyze the situation.
Analyze the person or people involved.
Take time to analyze the reasons they behave the way they do.
See if you can figure out why and when you do, youll be able to act in a level-headed manner.
Treating Anger Disorders: Anger Management Treatment Program Options
Uncontrolled anger can affect your relationships, your job and your health. Rage can take over your life and result in depression, violence and suicidal feelings. Your kids, neighbors and coworkers can also be at risk from uncontrolled outbursts and erratic behavior. If you are suffering from anger issues, it is vital that you get the support you need to develop effective management strategies.
Several options are available, including both inpatient and outpatient treatment with mental health counselors. Executive treatment programs and luxury facilities are also available to serve a wider variety of patients. Modern treatments are targeted and effective, often offering results in as little as six to eight weeks.
Recommended Reading: How To Reduce Stress For Cats
How To Control Your Anxiety
Because anger, in this case, is an anxiety problem, you’ll need to learn to control your anxiety altogether if you want to stop feeling angry.
There are several effective stress reduction strategies, including:
- Deep Breathing
- Progressive Muscle Relaxation
- Yoga
All forms of exercise are crucial for controlling both anxiety and anger as well, because they’re used to reduce pent up energy and frustration in a way that few other things can.
But you’ll also need to focus on simply learning to understand how to cope with anxiety and stress in a way that works for you. Coping is your brain’s ability to simply get over a problem without making it a big deal. It’s something that can be learned, but only if you are able to recognize the causes of your anxiety and how to adapt to them.
Was this article helpful?
Why Am I So Angry
Anger tells us we need to take action to put something right. It gives us strength and energy, and motivates us to act.
But for some people, anger can get out of control and cause problems with relationships, work and even the law.
Long-term, unresolved anger is linked to health conditions such as high blood pressure, depression, anxiety and heart disease.
It’s important to deal with anger in a healthy way that doesn’t harm you or anyone else.
You May Like: Can Stress And Anxiety Cause Chest Pain
Tip : Explore Whats Really Behind Your Anger
Have you ever gotten into an argument over something silly? Big fights often happen over something small, like a dish left out or being ten minutes late. But theres usually a bigger issue behind it. If you find your irritation and anger rapidly rising, ask yourself, What am I really angry about? Identifying the real source of frustration will help you communicate your anger better, take constructive action, and work towards a resolution.
Is your anger masking other feelings such as embarrassment, insecurity, hurt, shame, or vulnerability? If your knee-jerk response in many situations is anger, its likely that your temper is covering up your true feelings. This is especially likely if you grew up in a family where expressing feelings was strongly discouraged. As an adult, you may have a hard time acknowledging feelings other than anger.
Anger can also mask anxiety. When you perceive a threat, either real or imagined, your body activates the fight or flight response. In the case of the fight response, it can often manifest itself as anger or aggression. To change your response, you need to find out whats causing you to feel anxious or scared.
Anger problems can stem from what you learned as a child. If you watched others in your family scream, hit each other, or throw things, you might think this is how anger is supposed to be expressed.
Anger can be a symptom of another underlying health problem, such as depression , trauma, or chronic stress.
The Power Of Using I Statements
An I statement is a way of communicating the frustration you feel towards a person or situation without necessarily forcing blame upon them.
Using a you statement might be something like, youve ruined the roast. Look at it, youve burned it to a bloody crisp!
Whereas an I statement might be more along the lines of, Im really frustrated that the roast is ruined. I was looking forward to eating that
One statement focuses the ire and blame upon the person who burned the roast, while the other acknowledges the anger without aiming it at anyone in particular.
Correct use of I statements can really help to soothe a tense situationBut, sadly it wont save a burnt roast.
Recommended Reading: How To Not Stress During Pregnancy