Why You Must Learn How To Stop Stressing Out Over Everything
Picture this: Its a beautiful crisp morning, the birds were singing and the sun was shining another glorious day. But, youre late for work! Your alarm clock decided it forgot how to function so you woke up late. But thats not all, you forgot to switch your cars lights off and your battery ran dry and now youre stuck in the traffic. As each minute ticks by and youre still idling, the traffic flow stagnant, you start to feel those prickly feelings in your fingers, your palms start to sweat, your heart rate starts racing and you feel panic take over. Even though this is a natural response your body possesses, going through high-stress levels every day is unhealthy for our bodies. This is only one example of a cause of stress but our busy, modern-day lives are full of triggers ready to take their toll. From feeling worried about our loved ones, disputes with coworkers, being diagnosed with an illness, or losing a friend. This article will help you learn how to stop stressing out about everything so you can focus on your well-being.
All Types Of Anxiety Can Lead To Obsessive Thoughts
The idea of “obsession” is that you cannot focus on anything other than a specific issue , and no matter how hard you try you cannot distract yourself. Many people who dont have anxiety disorders still experience such thoughts. For example, your first crush back in high school may have led to obsessive thoughts at the time, if their affection was all you could think about.
But when these thoughts are negative or cause you anxiety/stress, then it’s highly likely you have an anxiety disorder.
Psychological Tricks That Will Help You Stop Worrying About Things You Cant Control
Head shot serious puzzled African American businessman looking at laptop screen sitting in office. … Executive managing thinking received bad news keeping fist at chin waiting hoping positive result
Worrying stems from a desire to be in control. We often want to control our environment. Or we may want control over the outcome of every situation.
But the more you try to control everything around you, the more anxious youll feel.
Its a vicious cycle to break worry, try to gain control, fail, and worry again. Repeat.
Worrying about things you cant control like the state of the economy or someone elses behavior will drain you of the mental strength you need to be your best.
It can also lead to other toxic habits, like blaming yourself too much or micromanaging other people.
Fortunately, you don’t have to resign yourself to being a lifelong “worry-wart.” You can take control of your mind and train your brain to think differently.
Here are two things you can do the next time you catch yourself worrying about things you can’t control:
1. Develop a realistic sense of control.
Identify what is within your control and what isn’t. For example, you can control how eye-catching your marketing ads are, but you cant control whether people buy your product.
Additionally, you can give your employees the tools they need to succeed, but you cant force them to be productive.
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Notice Old Patterns Arising In This Novel Circumstance
Though pandemic-related worries are new, Dr. Cairo notes that if you examine them closely, familiar patterns emerge. “Even though it feels different, it’s very likely triggering similar patterns for us,” she says. Examining what those patterns may befor me, it’s a familiar fear of running out of moneycan help you employ strategies you’ve used in the past to combat them.
Is Your Worry Solvable
Productive, solvable worries are those you can take action on right away. For example, if youre worried about your bills, you could call your creditors to see about flexible payment options. Unproductive, unsolvable worries are those for which there is no corresponding action. What if I get cancer someday? or What if my kid gets into an accident?
If the worry is solvable, start brainstorming. Make a list of all the possible solutions you can think of. Try not to get too hung up on finding the perfect solution. Focus on the things you have the power to change, rather than the circumstances or realities beyond your control. After youve evaluated your options, make a plan of action. Once you have a plan and start doing something about the problem, youll feel much less anxious.
If the worry is not solvable, accept the uncertainty. If youre a chronic worrier, the vast majority of your anxious thoughts probably fall in this camp. Worrying is often a way we try to predict what the future has in store-a way to prevent unpleasant surprises and control the outcome. The problem is, it doesnt work. Thinking about all the things that could go wrong doesnt make life any more predictable. Focusing on worst-case scenarios will only keep you from enjoying the good things you have in the present. To stop worrying, tackle your need for certainty and immediate answers.
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Why Approval Addiction Hurts Us
- Youre basing your self-worth on others biased opinion
Other people are going to judge you based on their ownlife experience, that is not something you can control.
They may have had a next door neighbour who laughed like you do and so their opinion of you is coloured by how they thought of their neighbour. Or, they may have a very strong opinion about people who wear hats inside based on how they were raised.
You cantchange peoples bias of you any more than you can change the colour of the sky. When you handpeople the power over your own self-worth, you are setting yourself up for a life filled with insecurity.
- It will never be enough
The need for externalapproval is something that never ends. Once you need approval to feel worthy, you will constantly seek it.
Sure you may get it one day, but what about the day after that? And the week after that?
You will chase it forever and will never feel fulfilled. There will always be a need to feel accepted.
- Your happiness is at the mercy of other people
When you need approval to feel worthy, you are essentially handing the keys to your own happiness over to other people. You relinquish control of your life to another persons whims.
- Its human to want to be ourselves
As much as connection is a human need, so is the need to express ourselves as individuals.
When we have to squash down who we really are in order to please others, we end up unhappy, depressed, anxious and resentful.
- Easy prey
Worrying Too Much Can Affect Your Daily Life
Worry begets worry, so its easy to start worrying about one or two bad things, only to end up worrying about even more areas of your life.
When anxious thoughts become part of your everyday life, your stress can show up at work, with your family, in your finances, and even in your hobbies. In addition, feelings of stress are becoming more and more common in adults over the past few years. Learning how to stop worrying is more crucial than ever to maintain good mental health.
Over time, too much worry can impact your emotional resilience and make completing necessary tasks harder. Learning how to stop worrying can bring relief and happiness to your life. This can quickly reverse the effects of excessive stress and anxiety.
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Put Yourself In A Position To Have More Control
If possible , put yourself in a position to have more control over the situation.
For example, lets say you want to get a promotion. But your company isnt giving you one because they dont want to pay you more.
One option is to get more control of the situation, by looking for another job. And then either taking that new job or possibly negotiating for a counter offer.
Stop Worrying By Practicing Mindfulness And Meditation
While worrying, you may have a hard time focusing on anything else. However, constant rumination on negative thoughts is a bad habit.
When you feel your concentration waning, sitting in a quiet room and clearing your mind can do wonders for your well-being. Mindfulness and meditation can take your focus away from negative thoughts, stop you from feeling anxious, and inspire a state of calm.
A guided meditation app can help clear your mind, refocus your thoughts, or distract from your worries. Over time, meditation can also help you get into a flow state, which allows you to focus on your priorities and knock tasks off your to-do list with ease. Learning to focus on whats in front of you, instead of your worries, can truly change your life.
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Excessive Worry Can Make You Physically Ill
Physical signs can be the first sign that constant worrying is becoming a problem. Headaches, stomach aches, and shortness of breath can indicate that youre experiencing excessive worry.
- Stomach pain, nausea, or other gastrointestinal problems
- Sweating more than usual
- Feeling restless, tense, or paranoid
These symptoms can also serve as a sign to examine how youre feeling. You may need to practice deep breathing and focus on relieving your worry. Ultimately, one of the first steps towards learning how to stop worrying is to identify these physical symptoms.
Critical Stop Stressing Tactic: Look For Glass Is Half Full Opportunities
A while back, my wife had a lot of pain in a few of her teeth.
We went to the dentist, and she ended up having to go through a series of painful root canals and other operations.
At first glance, this was miserable .
But on the flip side, there was a big glass-is-half-full opportunity.
My wife has been struggling with a severe anxiety of being around people. Due to her anxiety, she hadnt been out in public much for a few years, including the dentist.
As painful and awful as it was, the pain in her teeth forced her to go into the dentist multiple times.
Which has helped reduce some of her anxiety over being in public places. .
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Ways To Stop Stressing About Things You Cant Change
Do you ever find yourself worrying about things that you cant even control? Have you ever been unable to stop stressing about something out of your reach? Do you often find yourself overthinking but reaching no particular answer?
Nowadays, life is so complicated that people find themselves spiraling. They often think about what they should have done better in the past. People have so many responsibilities. They have to make so many decisions that some of them are bound to haunt them. Because of this reason, people stress about things that they cant ever change. If you are one of those people who are often in their heads and think about every little detail of their life, that can be harmful.
How Can I Stop Stressing
Stress is natural and can be good for you in small doses. However, too much stress can have negative health effects. Here are some ways to stop stressing when it feels like a channel in your brain that won’t turn off.
- Set some goals to stop your stressors if you’re able to control them. If you can’t, realize that there are some parts of your life that you cannot change.
- Get enough sleep, eat right, and exercise. This can help lower your stress levels.
- Take some time to unwind and focus on something that keeps you entertained or distracts you.
- Drugs and alcohol aren’t a way for you to escape from your stressors. A drink in moderation isn’t bad, but don’t drink every day excessively to get away.
- Don’t be afraid to talk about your stress, be it to a therapist or a friend. By expressing your feelings, there’s a good chance you’ll grow stronger as a result.
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Cause Your Own Anxiety
Finally, another thing you can try with the approval of your therapist is the idea of causing the anxiety yourself – in other words, purposely think about the thing that causes you that much distress.
The idea behind this is called behavioral habituation. If you stop fighting the thought and start experiencing it as often as possible on purpose, the thought will eventually become less stressful .
If it’s something you can do, like get your hands dirty, leave a light on, purposefully mess-up your apartment, etc., then you do it so that you get used to what the anxiety feels like and learn to fear the anxiety less. If it’s something that you simply think to yourself, like distressing thoughts, then try to trigger these thoughts intentionally, until you accept that they have no real meaning and allow yourself to find them less irritating.
It’s often best to do these in the presence of a professional, because this type of technique may not be right for everyone. Nevertheless, it’s been shown that the more you grapply with and accept the anxieties, the easier they may be to handle.
Meditation For Worrying About The Future
Learn how to move forward with less stress in the first part of this 10-day meditation course .
Listen to Fear of Future: Pt 1 – 12 minutes
Most thoughts, emotions, and anxiousness caused by worry are negative, imagining worst-case scenarios, anticipated threats, or scenarios that reflect our own lack of self-worth.
For instance, the worry could be that someone weâre meeting wonât like us or that an upcoming flight will lead to an emergency landing or that the nagging pain weâve noticed might well be a serious health condition. Most of the time, our worries donât pan out. Thatâs because worry is often invented by the mind, and is rarely rooted in fact or truth. Eventually, we come to realize that worrying about the future doesnât prevent tomorrowâs troubles, it just robs today of its joy. As an old quote goes: âWorry is the interest you pay on a debt you may not owe.â
Occasional anxiety over the future is a normal part of life. In fact, our brains are evolutionarily wired to worry: our cave-dwelling ancestors, who imagined the worst when they heard leaves rustle, had better odds of surviving a predator by being in this state of constant alert. So worrying, to some extent, is a natural part of life â we worry about paying a bill, or how a first date might turn out, or if the weather might ruin a planned BBQ.
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Awareness Is The Beginning Of Change
Before you can begin to address or cope with your habit of overthinking, you need to learn to be aware of it when its happening. Any time you find yourself doubting or feeling stressed or anxious, step back and look at the situation and how youre responding. In that moment of awareness is the seed of the change you want to make.
Stop Worrying By Sharing Your Fears With Supportive Friends And Family
Its easy to get lost in your thoughts as a chronic worrier, forgetting about family and friends without realizing it. Connecting with others is a powerful method to transform your emotional well-being, even when you feel like isolating.
Sharing the source of your stress, anxiety, or worry with a family member or friend can help you maintain perspective. Many times, our worries are irrational, but they dont seem that way in our own minds.
Talking with supportive friends or family can offer a new view of the situation and be an effective way to stop worrying.
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How Do I Stop Worrying About The Past
The past can be our worst enemy. We grow as people and learn, and we regret what weve did in the past or what others have done to you. Theres a chance youre stronger by miles compared to your past, yet youre still focused on the past. Learning to change the channel of your thoughts and think about the present more is difficult, but it is possible. Here are some ways.
Overall, its important to acknowledge that your thoughts are in the past, but you need to find ways to return to the present.
Dont Run Yourself Ragged
Say no! If you are a people-pleaser it is very hard to say no when someone asks you to do something, even if your schedule is already overwhelming. I suggest that you always say let me get back to you on that then actually ask yourself:
a) Do I want to do it?
b) Do I have time to do it without making myself overwhelmed?
It is usually easier to say no when you are not face to face with someone.
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How Much Worrying Is Too Much
Worries, doubts, and anxieties are a normal part of life. Its natural to worry about an unpaid bill, an upcoming job interview, or a first date. But normal worry becomes excessive when its persistent and uncontrollable. You worry every day about what ifs and worst-case scenarios, you cant get anxious thoughts out of your head, and it interferes with your daily life.
Constant worrying, negative thinking, and always expecting the worst can take a toll on your emotional and physical health. It can sap your emotional strength, leave you feeling restless and jumpy, cause insomnia, headaches, stomach problems, and muscle tension, and make it difficult to concentrate at work or school. You may take your negative feelings out on the people closest to you, self-medicate with alcohol or drugs, or try to distract yourself by zoning out in front of screens. Chronic worrying can also be a major symptom of Generalized Anxiety Disorder , a common anxiety disorder that involves tension, nervousness, and a general feeling of unease that colors your whole life.
If youre plagued by exaggerated worry and tension, there are steps you can take to turn off anxious thoughts. Chronic worrying is a mental habit that can be broken. You can train your brain to stay calm and look at life from a more balanced, less fearful perspective.
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